I'll Be There For You
by bluemoon212
Summary: The rings she had worn for eleven years had come off today and were now lying at the bottom of Elliot Bay. She couldn't believe she had thrown away the past eleven years of her life. Addison centric.AU.Rating to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: okay, so this is my first fanfiction ever. let me know what you think. i don't care if you think that it's the worst story you ever read or the best fic you've laid your eyes on. PLEASE give me some feedback. thank you. :.))_

_Disclaimer: "guess what!!! season 4 is airing on august 2 because i'm just that amazing." clearly i am not shonda rhimes, otherwise that would actually happen. :.\_

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Addison stepped off the ferry with a tear in her eye, the wind blowing her long red hair all around. The rings she had worn for eleven years had come off today and were now lying at the bottom of Elliot Bay. She couldn't believe she had thrown away the past eleven years of her life. She loved those years with Derek. Eleven birthdays, eleven Christmases, eleven wonderful years of marriage- no, wait make that nine. Nine birthdays, nine Christmases, and NINE wonderful years of marriage. The last two were...well, the last two years were filled with career success, which led to absence, and oh, yeah. Can't forget the adultery. Addison was still baffled at her own stupidity to "scratch the itch" with anyone other than Derek...especially with Mark, who happened to be Derek's best friend at the time. That was just plain idiotic. Addison sighed as she walked through the parking lot toward her car on this crisp, cloudy afternoon. No, make that freaking-pouring-rain-y afternoon! She screamed in her head as the tears started to run down her face faster. "Why didn't I bring the damn umbrella!?!" she screamed to no one as she got into her car. "Derek warned me to take an umbrella when I left the hospital, but NO! Stupid me has to ignore him! Why does he always have to be right!?!- Damn it!" she yelled as she turned the key- the car didn't start. She banged her fists on the steering wheel and then laid her hands on her hands and began to sob. She wished she could take everything back- the affair, the divorce, coming to Seattle- EVERYTHING. She sat and cried, and eventually became so tired she knew that, even if the car was running, she wasn't capable of driving. She sighed, got out of the car, and walked around to her trunk. She popped it open and found her small pillow and a blanket she kept there for emergencies. She closed the trunk and got back in the car. She threw the pillow and blanket into the back seat and locked the doors. Then, she crawled into the back seat and lay down. She though of how her life had changed since New York. She wondered if it was all part of God's master plan. If everything really did have a reason, then what was the reason behind her losing the man she one thought, maybe still thought, was the love of her life? Tears began to roll down her cheeks once again, and she began to fall asleep.

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_Okay, so not much happened in that chapter, but bear with me. the next few chapters get better. ;.))_


	2. Chapter 2

Addison awoke, startled and confused. She was in her car. What time is it? she thought. She leaned into the front seat and put the key in the ignition. The clock read 3:12 PM. "I can't believe I fell asleep for 2 hours." she mumbled to herself. She looked around and saw that the clouds had cleared and the sun had come out. She got out of her car and decided to take a walk along the shore of the bay. She looked around as she was walking. "All alone." she sighed. She remembered her and Derek walking along the beach in Montauk. They had driven out for their honeymoon when they lived in New York. She remembered driving out to the lighthouse their first evening there. They had walked along the beach, hand in hand, whispering sweet nothings and talking about their future. That was their first vacation together. That was where they fell in love over and over again. She closed her eyes as she walked, picturing Derek's handsome face. She could almost feel the breeze that only came off the Atlantic Ocean. Montauk... Addison doubted she could ever go back there. There were too many memories, too many promises made, too many emotions she longed to feel again. As she walked along the shore in her reverie, she didn't notice that someone had started walking along side her...


	3. Chapter 3

"Addison!... ADDIE!!...ADDIE!!!" he yelled.

She broke away from her daydream and gave him a questioning look. The confusion suddenly turned to anger and sadness.

"Go away. I don't want to see your face...EVER AGAIN!" she said.

"Addie... can't we just talk? You look like you need to talk." he asked warily.

"No! Just go away. I don't need to talk. Especially not to you. Why did you even follow me here?" she asked loudly.

"I thought that we should talk...about, well, you know..." he told her.

"We don't need to talk. What we need... what I need... is to never see each other again- ever. And what you need is to get the hell away from me." she said dangerously low.

"But addie..." he took her hands in his, holding them tightly.

"Let go! Just let me go!" she cried in frustration.

"But I love you Addison." he whispered as he gently wiped away her fresh tears with his thumbs. "I've loved you for...ever." he told her, hoping desperately that she would believe him. Addison looked at his handsome, seemingly sincere face. "No. no you don't, mark."


	4. Chapter 4

_A/N: okay, so since you're on the 4th really chort chapter (sorry about that) thanks for reading it this far. i'm just letting you know that for the next few chapters bold words indicates a flashback. (don't worry i'll remind you every chapter or so.)_

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Addison awoke the next morning and, once again, was confused. She looked around and saw mark lying next to her, fast asleep. He wasn't wearing a shirt and the blanket was covering the rest of him. She looked under her half of the covers. oh crap! she thought. She tried desperately to remember the night before as she lay next to mark. 

**"No you don't, mark." Addison said with anger and a touch of sadness.**

** "Addie..." Mark said softly.**

**"Don't call me that!" **

**"Fine then...Addison Forbes Montgomery-Shepherd." he said. Addison shuddered when he said her ex-husband's last name. **

**"Not shepherd?" asked Mark. She had caught his interest with the shudder. **

**"No... we got a divorce." **

**"Oh, Addison, I'm sorry. When?" Mark asked, almost sympathetically.**

**"About two months ago. I still can't get over the fact that those eleven years are just going to waste. I wish I could redo the last 15 years. My marriage is over. My life is over."**

**"Addison...that part of your may be over, but the last two years of your marriage don't have to be. Addison come back to New York with me." **

**"Mark...I...I don't think I can go back...I think it's over." she said as tears began to roll down her cheeks again. **

**Mark wiped away her tears "Addie...it's not over."**

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_okay so now we have something interesting happening. addison woke up naked in mark's bed. don't worry. we're getting to the explanation. :.)_


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: just reminding you that bold is a flashback._

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**Addison looked mark in the eye and saw concern and, was that hope? **

**"Mark..." he looked at her tired appearance and put a hand gently under her chin. **

**"Shhhh. Addie." **

**She was so tired. She gave in and rested her head on Mark's chest. He looked down at her mess of red hair and began to rub her back. She sighed and looked at him. maybe he does care about me she thought. Mark sat down on the sand. Addison followed and leaned against his shoulder. She found herself so comfortable that she fell into a deep sleep. Mark laid down, guiding Addison so she didn't fall. Her head landed on Mark's chest. Soon they were both sound asleep.**

**Addison was awoken some time later by a seagull squawking overhead. She stretched and looked at Mark, who stirred awake. **

**"Hi." Mark said groggily. **

**"Hey." **

**"So, why were you walking alone?" Mark asked her.**

**"I don't want to talk about it." she sighed. **

**"Come on. Let's go somewhere we can eat and talk. I can tell you need someone who cares to talk to." he pressed her.**** She looked at her watch; it was only five twenty. **

**"Fine, but I won't tell you all of it." she gave in. They walked back to Mark's car and drove away from the water that held Addison's past.**

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_i haven't asked in a while, so i thought i might remind you to please give me some feedback on my story. both positive and negitive comments are welcome. thank you in advance. :.)_


	6. Chapter 6

_A/N: just reminding you that bold means flashback. :.)_

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****Mark turned off his car and opened his door. He then walked around the car to open Addison's. **

**"Why, thank you" Addison said with a smile. **

**She got out of the car and they walked into the Emerald City Bar. Joe, the bartender, looked up from pouring a martini and saw Addison and Mark walk into the bar. **

**"Hey Joe! Can we grab a booth?" Addison asked.**

**"Sure go right ahead." Mark and Addison sat down across from each other and ordered their drinks. **

**"Double scotch, single malt." Mark told Joe. **

**"I'll have the same" Addison said. Mark looked at her bemusedly.**

**"I like scotch- get over it." Addison smirked. They looked at each other and began to laugh. After finishing two rounds of drinks, Addison decided to tell Mark what was bothering her.**

**"I think I'm still in love with Derek and I feel like I wasted those eleven years of my life. I threw my rings into the bay today, trying to move on. I want to move on from him, Mark. I **_**need**_** to move on. I need to find my perfect guy. Someone who loves me like I love them. Who will catch me when I fall. Someone who will wipe away my tears and hold me when I'm lonely to remind me that they'll always be there for me. I want someone who -who will promise to be there- no matter what. Even if I yell, even if they yell, they will always come home." She sighed, shedding a tear and finishing her fourth drink. Mark reached across the table and wiped away the tear, his hand lingering on her face. **

**"I can understand that, Addie" he smiled sadly. She looked at his face, which was gentle with understanding and compassion. Addison sighed and leaned into his hand, smiling slightly back at Mark.**

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_A/N: okay, so addie is wasted. there's no doubt about it, which should lead to interesting scenarios... ;.)_


	7. Chapter 7

_A/N: Just a reminder that bold is a flashback._

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_**After several more rounds of drinks, Addison stumbled up to the bar. She slurred her words as she asked Joe for another drink. **

**"No, I'm cutting you off." Joe told her. **

**"I am **_**fine**_**, Joe, just give me my damn drink." she insisted. **

**Joe turned around to pour a drink for another customer, ignoring Addison. Addison was sure she could handle a few more drinks – she was fine after all. So, she reached over the bar and grabbed the first bottle within her reach, which happened to be a bottle of vodka. She twisted the cap and put the bottle to her lips, and began to drink straight from the bottle. Mark came up behind her and put his arms around her. She turned around and looked him in his eyes. He took the bottle out of her hands and paid the tab. Joe gave him his change and a cup of coffee for Addison to drink. Mark took the coffee and guided Addison to the car. Addison stumbled out of the bar, falling every few steps, spilling the coffee all over herself. Mark followed her closely, catching her every time she fell. **

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**When they got back to Mark's apartment, he led Addison to the shower. He sat her down on the closed toilet seat and turned on the water, filling up the tub. He helped her take off her shirt. She slurred her words as she asked him what he was doing. Mark looked at Addison, who had a strange look on her face. **

**"Addie, I was helping you get undressed to take a bath. Don't worry." Mark told her. **

**Addison glared at Mark and then fell onto his shoulder, hugging him, and said "Oh Markey. This is why I love you."**

**He looked at Addison, who smiled at him drunkly. He finished helping her undress and let her lean on him to get into the bathtub. She sat down and looked at him. **

**"What, Addie?" he asked her.**

**"Well I can't take a bath with you standing there." she giggled.**

**"Okay. I'll be in the next room if you need help." he said and walked out of the room. Halfway through the door he stopped and swiftly turned around. He walked up to Addison and briefly kissed her. Her breath caught as Mark kissed her. She closed her eyes and melted into the kiss. Mark pulled away.**

**"See you after your bath."**

**He turned around with a smirk on his face as Addison stared at him lustfully.**

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_A/N: So Mark stopped drinking way before Addison did, so he's sober. What do you think so far:.))_


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: sorry for the long time with no update. i was on vacation in hawaii. :.)) reminder:: bold is a flashback

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****Addison finished taking a bath, stood up and tripped out of the shower. She caught herself on the counter, opened the bathroom door and stumbled into the bedroom. Mark was already asleep, so the room was dark. Addison walked into the middle of the room and fell onto the bed. She crawled up to the pill and fell into a deep sleep.**

By the time she had remembered some of the previous night, most of the memories were of before her last drink, the shower was off and Mark walked back into the room. Addison rolled over and saw that the only thing covering him was his towel that he was wrapping around him. oh….my…god… Addison thought. He's still gorgeous after all these years. Mark put on a pair of boxers, and turning around saw that Addison was awake. He walked to the edge of the bed and lay down next to her. Addison swallowed nervously.

"Mark did we…ummm… did we have sex last night?" she asked.

"No. I was asleep by the time you finished your bath."

"Okay. Good. That's good."

Mark looked at her offended "Why is that good? Is it because you wouldn't want to have sex with me?" he teased.

"No. I would just want to remember it." She replied with a smirk. Mark looked at her curiously and Addison smiled and moved closer to Mark.


End file.
